Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Jeremy Clarkson Agrees With Me (Somewhat)

I am sure many have been offended by my previous article, but my boyhood hero, Jeremy Clarkson actually agrees. Here I quote from his piece on the Alfa Romeo MiTo in his column in The Times.

"For some time now I’ve been on the hunt for a new one but the choice is tricky. I couldn’t have a Breitling because I don’t own an Audi. I couldn’t have a Calvin Klein because they are pants, I couldn’t have a Gucci because I’m not a footballist’s wife, I couldn’t have a TW Steel because my wrist isn’t big enough to sport something that can be seen from space, I couldn’t have a Tissot because I’m not eight and the only thing in the world worse than a fake Rolex is a real one."

Obviously you who take offense would think 'Aha! He hates Rolexes; the very brand you kiss-ass'. No. I only like that one model because it looks that way. It's not a brand thing. It's a look thing. It's like liking aviators; you don't care if they're Ray Ban or not, just as long as they look like fucking aviators. Rolexes these days...have too much gold and diamonds and bling. Hence Clarkson's utter dislike.

"And then one day, in Hong Kong, I saw it. A new Omega. It’s called the Railmaster and it is a thing of unparalleled beauty. There is no button that owners think will call for help if they find themselves in a crashing helicopter on Kilimanjaro, it is not waterproof to 8,000 metres, there is no stopwatch, there is no swivelling bezel to tell you how much air you have left in your tanks and you even have to wind it up every morning or it will stop. Plainly this is a watch for the sedentary soul. The man with no hang glider or mini sub in his garage. I bought it in an instant."

And it is a beauty. I won't like it due to the leather strap. But google it and you'll see it really is as he says it. Oh, and you can't blame me for being too fussy about all the gadgetry on watches these days, now, can you?

As an aside, the Alfa Romeo MiTo is named so because it was designed in Milano (Milan) and built in Torino (Turin). In Series 12 Episode 5 of Top Gear, Jeremy asked "what if they designed it in Twickenham and built it in Attercliffe?"