Probably February 2006
I had just completed the whole registration merry-go-round at INTEC. It was as inauspicious as shit, seeing as to how there were only three of us. Registering early. For no good reason. Or that much of an advantage. But there we were, the three of us, being given a lecture or briefing by a counselor--admittedly, a rather ancient one--about blending in and how "ini bukan sekolah lagi dah".
Then she made us step forward and sign a blank sheet of paper. Since I was standing in the middle I went second, sandwiched between both girls. She looked at the first's John Hancock, studied it for a bit, then squared her up. "Walaupun awak ada banyak isu, awak bijak gunakan keceriaan untuk sorokkannya." Or something like that. Then added a word or two about how it's a good thing and how it can be a bad thing.
Then she looked to her other side--bypassing me--and told the other girl, "Awak pula seroang yang gigih, dan berani. Tapi jangan terlalu tegas!" Again, I don't quite remember verbatim but it was something to that affect.
Then it was my turn. The other two got a few simple words of advice. Admittedly, some of it actually made sense, and was eerily accurate. But judging you from your signature? Really? Anyway. She looked at it, then looked at me and said "Saya dapat lihat awak akan jadi seorang yang sangat berjaya." This caught me by surprise. Nothing about my character. But now she can see the future though. The girl on my left suddenly blurted, "Tu la, saya pun rasa begitu!" I had no idea (still have no idea) if those sentiments were also based on a freaking signature. The counselor looked back at me and said, "Tapi tak mudah. Tiada apa dalam hidup mudah. Awak harus tekun... Harus kerja dengan kuat."
Back then it scared me. It was a good fear, yet something I equally dreaded. Right now I think back to those pointless words and can't help but think any idiot can say that. You'll make it big one day. Just work hard. Nothing's easy in life. Ha. Was she just talking out of her ass? Why were theirs a character study, but mine a look into my future? I honestly don't believe I'm special. 'Different' may be a better word. But special? And being told so by some dinosaur who can't even garner the respect of a classroom of 18 kids wasn't very convincing either. Perhaps it was the occasion. Perhaps it was just how I was feeling at the time. It's pointless, but for some reason, it became one of those pep talks you get etched in your head forever. Maybe it's true. Maybe one day I'll get the meaning of it. Maybe she was speaking old people speak, and I'm still unqualified/uninitiated to be able to understand.
If it is your intention to give advice--life-changing one--you don't have to be so vague or cryptic. The two best I've ever had were from the least expected sources. One was from National Service. As I said my good-byes before I left the place, my classroom instructor called me up and signed my workbook. She said, "Shazwan, sayangi diri sendiri sebelum awak sayangi yang lain. Selamat maju jaya". I respected this because 1) my name was spelt sH; 2) it was touching, and; 3) for some reason she knew I was heartbroken. Ha. But still. It made sense, and it was straight to the point. And it wasn't something far-fetched either.
The other one came from closer to home. "Here's the thing about me. I'm an asshole through and through. And I accept that. I don't feel in any way inadequate or that I have to change my ways. I am at peace with myself." This was in 2007. And he had only two As in his SPM--proof positive that you needn't degrees or PhDs or be someone 'superior' to give smartass advice.
It's pointless trying too hard, isn't it?
I had just completed the whole registration merry-go-round at INTEC. It was as inauspicious as shit, seeing as to how there were only three of us. Registering early. For no good reason. Or that much of an advantage. But there we were, the three of us, being given a lecture or briefing by a counselor--admittedly, a rather ancient one--about blending in and how "ini bukan sekolah lagi dah".
Then she made us step forward and sign a blank sheet of paper. Since I was standing in the middle I went second, sandwiched between both girls. She looked at the first's John Hancock, studied it for a bit, then squared her up. "Walaupun awak ada banyak isu, awak bijak gunakan keceriaan untuk sorokkannya." Or something like that. Then added a word or two about how it's a good thing and how it can be a bad thing.
Then she looked to her other side--bypassing me--and told the other girl, "Awak pula seroang yang gigih, dan berani. Tapi jangan terlalu tegas!" Again, I don't quite remember verbatim but it was something to that affect.
Then it was my turn. The other two got a few simple words of advice. Admittedly, some of it actually made sense, and was eerily accurate. But judging you from your signature? Really? Anyway. She looked at it, then looked at me and said "Saya dapat lihat awak akan jadi seorang yang sangat berjaya." This caught me by surprise. Nothing about my character. But now she can see the future though. The girl on my left suddenly blurted, "Tu la, saya pun rasa begitu!" I had no idea (still have no idea) if those sentiments were also based on a freaking signature. The counselor looked back at me and said, "Tapi tak mudah. Tiada apa dalam hidup mudah. Awak harus tekun... Harus kerja dengan kuat."
Back then it scared me. It was a good fear, yet something I equally dreaded. Right now I think back to those pointless words and can't help but think any idiot can say that. You'll make it big one day. Just work hard. Nothing's easy in life. Ha. Was she just talking out of her ass? Why were theirs a character study, but mine a look into my future? I honestly don't believe I'm special. 'Different' may be a better word. But special? And being told so by some dinosaur who can't even garner the respect of a classroom of 18 kids wasn't very convincing either. Perhaps it was the occasion. Perhaps it was just how I was feeling at the time. It's pointless, but for some reason, it became one of those pep talks you get etched in your head forever. Maybe it's true. Maybe one day I'll get the meaning of it. Maybe she was speaking old people speak, and I'm still unqualified/uninitiated to be able to understand.
If it is your intention to give advice--life-changing one--you don't have to be so vague or cryptic. The two best I've ever had were from the least expected sources. One was from National Service. As I said my good-byes before I left the place, my classroom instructor called me up and signed my workbook. She said, "Shazwan, sayangi diri sendiri sebelum awak sayangi yang lain. Selamat maju jaya". I respected this because 1) my name was spelt sH; 2) it was touching, and; 3) for some reason she knew I was heartbroken. Ha. But still. It made sense, and it was straight to the point. And it wasn't something far-fetched either.
The other one came from closer to home. "Here's the thing about me. I'm an asshole through and through. And I accept that. I don't feel in any way inadequate or that I have to change my ways. I am at peace with myself." This was in 2007. And he had only two As in his SPM--proof positive that you needn't degrees or PhDs or be someone 'superior' to give smartass advice.
It's pointless trying too hard, isn't it?
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