...And He Takes The Lead!

With the addition of two pairs of ridiculously discounted shoes from adidas during the Black Friday sale, I now lead Dian 18-16 in our ongoing Perang Kasut.

The score, however, will not remain the same for long, as two or three pairs still in service will have to be retired. This shall make the task of keeping the lead a tricky one; it is unwise to rest on our laurels over a whisker-thin lead.

And we must never underestimate the willingness-to-buy of a girl who will never accept losing something like this to a guy.

But let's not let it rain on our parade. I now have the lead.

Ladies & Gentlemen, This Woman Is Awesome!

If you have the opportunity, take the time to read Eats, Shoots & Leaves by Lynne Truss. It's a best-selling book about punctuation. Yes. Punctuation.

The author is, in many ways, my hero. Admitting to a severe case of obsession on punctuation, she has always had a thing against the wrongful treatment of apostrophes, hyphens, brackets and ellipses. With her rallying cry "sticklers unite!" she calls upon people everywhere to unleash their inner stickler and correct the moronic punctuation errors we see: misplaced/missing apostrophes, confusion between it's and its, uneducated placement of commas, and many more. Much is also advocated about the colon and semi-colon: how their lack of use is slowly killing them off. Lynn Truss even took it upon herself to grab a marker (Sharpie, to you Americans) and apostrophise the horror that is the title of promotional posters for Two Weeks Notice.

Most of us have left school and lessons of grammar of any sort for quite some time now. While this book may not be a 'grammar bible' of sorts, it does point out the mistakes we fail to see, as well as the ambiguity of language in the modern day. Punctuation has come a long way since it was first introduced in the 15th century, and has many differing schools of thought and styles. In fact, more often than not, punctuation is more a question of style. However, there are some very interesting facts many of us never learnt.

For instance, 'Jones' in Bridget Jones's Diary quite rightly has a second s. Apparently, names that end in s do. Ancient names like Achilles and Archimedes, however, are an exception to the rule.

This is all hanky-panky bullshit, you say? Well, that's what separates people like you, and OCDs like us.

It Grows On You

I remember my first sip of ginger beer, which burns your throat if you're just a six year old. It wasn't nice. It tastes like ginger for God's sake! But then there was just something about the whole...flavor? Beneath the burning sensation in your throat, there's a very intriguing taste. I watered it down at first; and soon came to be at ease with something so vulgar. It grew on me.

Then came Schweppes' Bitter Lemon. It was bitter, yes. And sour. Biting a whole lemon, and chewing its skin, wouldn't be as unpleasant as your first ever sip. And it seemed exotic, too (in Malaysia, at least), which made it so much more appealing. I personally like anything citrus. So once I got past the bitterness, that drink was a joy to me. It grew on me.

Then came Dr. Pepper. All I could say after one swag was "this tastes like shit!" to which my brother replied "more for me la, then. Sedap sial benda ni". That was years ago. Probably a lifetime or two. I can't quite put my finger on what about that medicine-like taste that makes it so addictive. Was it cherry? Was it some cough syrup derivative? Although technically I could Google it, I can't quite be bothered about it now. For reasons I myself do not know, I kept trying Dr. Pepper throughout the years. Some time a couple of years back (when Cold Storage BSC imported them and sold them for a ridiculous RM3 each, with Fariz being the only customer) I suddenly enjoyed it. But it had to be chilled, and not watered down. And now Wal-Mart sells a crate of 24 for only $6.50. So this week my breakfasts, lunches and dinners are graced by you know what. It grew on me; but this time it's gone a little too far.

I could say the same about pineapple juice. Drink it once and your face will most likely turn into that of a horse's. Fresh pineapple juice, that is. None of those preservative- , coloring- and flavor-spiked bullshit. I never quite hated it, but I never quite liked it either. But somehow something about it got me hooked. It grew on me.

My drink preferences may not be of any interest to you or anyone for that matter. But the thing is, here is a list of things I either hated or was indifferent to; and now I swear by them. Why do we keep trying something we don't quite enjoy and then end up liking them? "It grows on me," you say, now that you're hooked. Why did you let it grow on you if you didn't like it in the first place? Unless we're forced to, we don't have to say, eat, drink or do anything we don't like; but why is it that we keep itching to opt for something we know we don't?

Some things we just can't explain. They just happen. That's life. And, well, it grows on you.

Calling All Who Speak Bahasa Melayu: BM TLAs

TLAs.

Three-letter acronyms. Not necessarily three--like 'ttyl'--but three is usually the case so yeah. I am a staunch advocate of the identity and purity of Bahasa Melayu. I may not be good at it (hence this post being in English), but reading something from say, A. Samad Said for instance, gives you the impression that he is of an exotic tongue. It's not him, really. He just speaks in non-borrowed Malay; no emansipasi or informasi or efektif bullshit. It's what has become of BM today.

But my point here isn't to tell you to learn a new rare Malay word a day or use a pepatah at least once a day. As discussed on the facebook group Saya Suka Bahasa Melayu!, I would like to share Malay versions of everyday TLAs. Some have been modified to suit the Malay language/culture.

OMG = OTK - oh, tuhanku!
LOL = GSH - gelak sekuat hati
ROTFL = KTBSSP - ketawa terbahak-bahak sampai senak perut
FYI = UPA - untuk pengetahuan anda
AKA = JDS - juga dikenali sebagai
GTG = SHP - saya harus pergi = AKB - aku kena blah
PDA = TTM - tak tau malu
BTW = DSI - di samping itu
WTF/WTH = ALS - apa lancau, sial
TTYL = CDKN - cakap dengan kamu/kau nanti
IMHO/IMO = PPS - pada pendapat saya
XOXO = CPCP - cium peluk cium peluk (not really a TLA but well...)

And here are some which do not have English equivalents.

NTE - nangis teresak-esak
STR/SMR - sakit teraung-raung/meraung-raung

Too much stress has been put on our language's rightful name--Bahasa Melayu or Bahasa Malaysia? Despite what this government may choose, you just get the feeling some time in the future they or a different one would change it yet again. Yet not much has been said, much less done, by us Malaysians and Malays to protect what is ours. Of course language will evolve with the times, but one could not help but feel responsible for the direction in which BM is headed. If we let the language slip, God forbid, who would give two hoots to save it?